using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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