no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
