If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
