i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
