I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
