i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Randomize
