oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
New definition for "rock bottom": Waking up in a puddle of your own puke, missing your fake tooth. Then having to dig through said puddle of puke for aforementioned fake tooth. Think it's time I quit partying so hard.
Is this your way of breaking up with me as my wingman?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
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