I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize