The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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