It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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