Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
