ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
