she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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