Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
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