if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize