well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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