guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
