i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
