and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
