Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
