I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
