So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Randomize
