he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
