ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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