is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
