You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
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