Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
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