is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
