And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
