Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
