I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
