he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
