You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
