Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
So. Much. Porn.
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