So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
