Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
