Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
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