go do what you do best...puke behind churches
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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