And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
