well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
