Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize