hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
