real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
