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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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