We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
