piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Randomize
