I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
