Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
It was like getting head from an anaconda
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize
