I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
