i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
